Grieving is a long and rough process that many don’t have the energy for, yet are blindsided by it the moment it happens. Although we love the people in our lives, not all of us want to grieve and ache over the loss of someone for years of our lives.
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Is it possible to speed up the grieving process?
These are three ways the grieving processes can be accelerated, and whether it’s healthy to attempt this.
Why Would Someone Want to Speed Up This Process?
If you’ve lost someone, you may feel like your grief over that person is the final thing connecting you to them. Under this false notion, you might believe that it’s better to continue to grieve and hurt yourself over their loss, even after it’s no longer healthy or sustainable to do so.
Speeding up the process allows you to move on with your life. Although you still feel the loss, miss them, and may feel like a small piece of you is missing, you’re able to work and function, which is what many want.
1. Prepare Yourself Before it Happens
The moment you have a family member going into hospice, you need to start researching grief support. Whether it’s in a group or a one-on-one setting, look into what resources are available to you and how you can contact them. This will make it easier after your loved one passes since you’ll already have somewhere, or someone, you can go to for help.
2. Talk to a Professional And Ask for Help
Talking to a professional is vital. If you don’t already have a therapist or mental health professional, now’s the time to get one. Talk to someone who isn’t just in your personal life as a friend. Although you can share with friends, you may end up feeling like you’re trauma-dumping, which isn’t healthy for either of you.
3. Talk to Family and Form Community
When the family member passes, talk to others who love and remember them. This will help you build community and feel closer to the memory of this person. You can’t bring them back any time soon, but you can stop and recognize how much they meant to everyone else in their world. Sometimes that’s enough to make everything easier.
Is It Healthy to Try and Skip Grief?
Skipping grief altogether could be a sign you’re over-intellectualizing your emotions or trying to swallow down feelings. This isn’t healthy since repressing feelings can lead to anger, anxiety, and even depression.
The only way to speed up the grieving process in a healthy way is to slow things down, consider their wants or wishes, and communicate clearly. Being open about your own emotions and exploring them can take you a long way.
Everyone Goes Through Grief Differently
Although you may grieve one way, and your family may grieve another, it’s important that you come from a place of understanding instead of judgment. Build stronger bonds by going through this, and work through the complicated emotions it might give you.